WTF is a Slim Thug anyway?

Black women are pissed again. First Don Imus called us “nappy headed hoes”, then John Maker admitted he wouldn’t dip his white penis in Keyshia Cole’s black vagina even to repopulate the earth after nuclear holocaust. Now Slim Thug, Grammy…MTV…Source… (Wait, is he an award-winning rapper? No?! Oh, ok let me start over). Now Slim Thug, random media thirsty rapper, has exposed his ignorant racial stereotypes about us and we’re ready to boycott his music. (Pause…again. I think we might have already been doing that). I’m of the opinion that Slim Thug’s antiquated bias against is own is based on three things: his mother didn’t hug him enough, he was ugly in high school (Pause times three…he’s STILL ugly?! Oh!) and most importantly: HE’S A FUCKING IDIOT!!! I don’t want to focus on the random stupidity of one ignoramus. Instead, I have three pieces of advice for Black women.

1. STOP MEANMUGGING INTERRACIAL COUPLES!!! I visited a friend in Minneapolis and I swear to God EVERY other Black man was with a woman who wasn’t Black. Didn’t bother me one single bit because the not Black men were AT me when we went to the club. What did bother me was a group of Black women who (while in a pretty classy sushi spot) trashed EVERY. SINGLE. WOMAN who walked by. Those broads looked at me, noticed my fly Chicago style and ill ass Westside glare, and kept their mouths shut. Then I noticed that the women they were insulting very loudly were all very fair-skinned and were probably biracial. At first I was disgusted, then I felt sorry for them. Based on what I saw, they didn’t stand a chance of dating a Black man. The women with Black men were with Black and GORGEOUS, or not Black…and well, just not Black. I won’t go into the whos, whats and whys, but with all that said, I imagined dating for Black women in Minneapolis might be very difficult.

We need to stop giving Black men with not Black women the side eye. What does it accomplish? They now know how you feel about it and as soon as they get home they’re gonna break up immediately. Sounds dumb, right? No amount of discourse with your girls at the beauty shop or evil glances you give the offending couple is going to change the dating habits of a Black man who has opted to date a non-Black woman. He may be “experimenting”, date non-Blacks exclusively, or randomly fell for a woman who isn’t Black. Stop living up to the Angry Black Woman stereotype by being an angry Black woman. We don’t roll our eyes when we see Black men with hoodrats, whores, and women in cheap shoes so kill the evil stares.

2. EXPAND YOUR HORIZONS Black women may be the only group that, as a whole, only date men of their own racial/ethnic background. As a matter of fact, we’re so stuck on Black men, we routinely opt for losers who’ll never amount to much just because they are the same race. It’s the same as buying rotten fruit at the grocery store because that’s all they have left. More than likely, you’ll go to another store. Instead of complaining (on national television nonetheless) about the absence of good Black men, try dating a good non-Black man. We’ve come to believe the negative stereotypes about ourselves and think only Black men like our luscious lips, voluptuous behinds, and brown skin. We’ve accepted the untruths that we’re angry, our hair is nappy, and we’re welfare queens. If we stop listening to idiots like Slim Thug and Don Imus, we would realize that many non-Black men are willing to venture outside their race to date us. My mother-in-law is Vietnamese and father-in-law is white and their son thought I was the most beautiful woman he had ever met in his life. We shared common interests, goals, and values. One of the few and least important things we didn’t share was racial and ethnic background. The reason it didn’t work had nothing to do with race

I’m not saying to totally discount Black men; if I were, I’d be just as bad as those who subscribe to the false belief that there are no good Black men left. What I am saying is that we are limiting ourselves when we choose not to date anything but. Join or eHarmony if you’re not sure where to go. Hang out with your coworkers. Join a social group. ANYTHING!!! Stop accepting bullshit because you want little black babies. Choose a partner because of what you have in common, but let race be the least important because it really is.

And last but not least:

3. STOP BEING UNREALISTIC!!! We often want our mate to be perfect when we are nowhere close. He has to look like Michael Ealy, drive a Bentley, make six-figures, attended a top-tier law school, have a body like a god, have a big dick and on and on and ON!! Really?!?! I’m not saying lower your standards (see #2) but understand that the perfect man doesn’t exist. You’re not going to meet Prince Charming at First Friday. As a matter of fact, you’re NEVER going to meet Prince Charming. What IS going to happen is that you’re going to meet a man that may be perfect for you, but because he pulled up in a ten year old Toyota, you discount him as a potential suitor. Good things may come in very oddly wrapped packages and if you’re too busy looking at his resume instead of listening during the interview, you might miss out on a man that is absolutely perfect for you.

There are always going to be negative stereotypes about Black women. Not living up to them is the first way to combat them. Next step: IGNORE THE DUMBASSES WHO HAVE THEM! If Slim Thug had said he only dates White women, I probably wouldn’t have paid much attention. But when he felt the need to disrespect Black women, he relegated himself to a group of people I have deemed unfit for human interaction. We spend far too much time concerned about who other people are dating. Date people who make you feel good, but don’t ignore the untapped world of Black women dating non-Black men. You might end up with a husband and a couple of little biracial babies.

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