How Many F$,!*s Do You Give?

These days, nobody gives a fuck. Folks pride themselves on counting the number of fucks they give and ending up right where they started: zero. Nights out kickin it begin and end with no fucks being given…but since dudes don’t give a fuck about these chicks and chicks don’t give a fuck about these dudes, I’m guessing nobody’s actually fucking. YOLO? In the midst of all the four letter shenanigans, people really have stopped caring. We pride ourselves on only looking out for ourselves, doing only what we want to do, and saying exactly what we want, whenever we want. We tweet celebrities and tell them how stupid they are. We snap pictures of unsuspecting strangers for offending our eyes with their awful. We Instagram screenshots of the dumb shit our friends do and say. We belittle the uneducated for their lack of intelligence who respond to their mentions being blown up for not knowing Rodney and Martin Luther were NOT brothers with feeble attempts at reclaiming their social media dignity. Of course, we don’t give no fuck and RT the shit out of it anyway.

Somehow, somewhere, when we all stopped caring, we started allowing ourselves to become jaded and bitter beings who lash out when we believe our opinions to be fact, undaunted by the hurt feelings we cause because we don’t give a fuck. Trayvon Martin was killed by a man who didn’t give a fuck that the teen’s Skittles weren’t a gun and that he might actually be terrified of the strange man following him around in the dark. Jerry Sandusky’s victims were robbed of their innocence because no one gave a fuck about the inappropriate nature of his relationship with under-privileged boys seeking a role model, a father figure, a friend. When Amy Winehouse and Whitney Houston lost their battles to the sickness that is addiction, far too many of us didn’t give a fuck that those women, and countless others, were ill. That they were terrorized by demons the sober can only pray never catch them. That they left behind people who loved them despite their troubles and saw only the beauty of their souls. But man, fuck their souls. They were crackheads, right? And crackheads die, right? Right?

We blame victims. We laud predators. We sit idly by while the rights of our peers are infringed upon. Gays, women, immigrants who speak Spanish. Who gives a fuck about them? We turn our backs on issues that matter and focus on the trivial, like how black women wear their hair and who will marry black women and why black women don’t smile. THOSE are things we give a fuck about. Not why black women are infected with HIV at a rate higher than our white, Asian and Hispanic counterparts. Clearly this is incorrect, because according to Dateline, nobody is checking for us so WHO are we fucking?! We give a whole lot of fucks about those Basketball? Wives? and fail to call attention to the fact that those broads ain’t no damn wives. Oh yeah, I forget, marriage is for white people. We don’t give a fuck about rings and shit and marriage is just a piece of paper. Apparently, a college degree is just a piece of paper, as well.

Perhaps, I’ve gotten it all wrong. I truly believe that deep down inside, we do care about more than being seen at church and brunch on Sunday morning. When my first graders felt helpless, when they believed the tasks they’d been given were too difficult to accomplish, they would act out. Reprimands, corrections and redirections would yield a quietly muttered, “I’on care!” when I knew for a fact that they did care. Maybe we’re all first graders on the inside, screaming out “We don’t give a fuck!!” because we don’t have the answers. We’re faced with situations we believed would be eradicated in post-racial, politically correct America. We’re better, bigger, faster, stronger yet we’re still not perfect. The only way to hide the embarrassment of our failures is to yell out – no longer fearful of being heard – we don’t give a fuck. I think we do.


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Closet Firecracker (@VenusHouseMama)
    Jun 26, 2012 @ 10:28:20

    Easily one of the best posts I’ve read from you. I’ve been guilty of YOLO-ing and I always ask myself and others: now what when you wake up the next morning?

    I’m definitely guilty of pretending not to care because caring has you open and open gets you hurt. Nonetheless, I usually do care so that’s all counterproductive.

    And, it\’s strange how caring makes you ”lame”. Anyway…thank you.


  2. Monique
    Jul 02, 2012 @ 07:58:45

    I am super guilty of yielding to the temptation to be cynical about everything. It’s awful! I actually want to give a care but don’t want to feel the pain that comes along with caring. Ug! This was a very convicting post. Thanks chica!


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