STFU 2011

There’s this McDonald’s commercial…no, not that coontastic one…no, not that one either. The one with the couple enjoying a cardiac distress inducing meal where the chick says: *insert neck roll* “Tyniquana new boooooyfriend say Sunday just for football. *insert lip smack* Can you buh-leeee dat?” (I took poetic license with this part, in keeping with the usual black McDonald’s ads) Her bitchmade ass boyfriend responds with: *insert pussy whooped alto* “Yeah baby, he’s a jerk.”

I. Could. Whoop. His. Ass.

This commercial is wrong on so many levels, but the one thing that fucks me up is that for a few months out of the year, ol’ boy wants to not be disturbed with her yingyang and watch the damn game. I am 1059% sure (no Maury) that any couple who buys into the nonsense portrayed in this ad will break up within 6 months. *puts reminder in agenda to set up for the rebound in March* Not only is he lying about something that is obviously important to him, it’s apparent – to me, at least – that any other response than the one he gave will result in a ridiculous and unnecessary argument. Too many people spend way too much time trying to mold their mates into the person they want them to be instead of celebrating what was so endearing about this person to begin with. We all have our quirks – some of us more than others – but at the end of the day, making a commitment to someone involves accepting not just their flaws, but their likes, hobbies, and interests, as well. NOTE: I do NOT mean things that are illegal, demeaning, or anything that makes you uncomfortable. If he spends every Sunday watching football, chances are he’s been watching football every Sunday his entire life so who the fuck are you to try to come between him and his game. Sorry bitch, first downs before females. You know how you get when Bad Girls Club, Basketball Wives, or whatever foolishness you broads watch these days comes on? Yeah, it’s like that. Now let me find out somebody I know is subscribing to that bullshit portrayed in the McDonald’s commercial. We’re gonna have to have a serious heart to heart about your future break up, because he’s going to get sick of lying to you to keep you from jappin’ out and he’s gonna leave yo ass for a white girl.

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